It was quite by chance that I entered palliative medicine after granduation years ago. I would never regret having been active in palliative care during my precious time, though I really dislike somebody's attitude and way of doing things.

Now I have quitted the specialty temporarily. However, what I've learnt in the early years of my medical career is benefiting me a lot. Actually, I think these treasures are not only requirements for health professionals in palliative medicine, but also necessary for doctors in all the other specialties.


When peopel are talking about medicine, "care" is a word that most peopel would use. Before we are using our medicine knowledge to cure, we must first care about what happened to the patient. This is important. However, before the study in Singapore, the first thing come to me after seeing a patient was what medicine should be used. It is stil the case for most health providers in my country until now.


Patients are people. When people are in a bad situation, what they need most is others' passion. Even passerbys could offer it. But in hospitals, such emotions seem disappears between the biggest two parts-patients and doctors. It remind me of the crying video during the course. What a pity I don't have a copy. The feeling of loneliness, helplessness, emptiness and desperation of the patients have touched me deeply. It was not a love story like some movies that make people cry, but the plain description delivers strong emotion and hardly anybody could stay calm.


Most people consider expertise just as medicine knowledges of what examinations should be done and what medicines should be used. However, what I would like to address is to know what should be done and what should not be done first! In this developing country, where economy is going up quickly and people's lusts are welling, it is easy to tell what should be done, but not easy to do. This may be my main reason why I left palliative care. Some people could do what they are asked to do just after they get what they want. However, some others need to obey some rules from their heart, whatever attraction is ahead.

In this conflicting world, where doctors are compaining of low payment and crticial patients, patients are complaining of high expense and bad doctors, I could not help to turn it into peace. But I would like to review what I've learnt to make myself peaceful and help what I can help.